in joy & sorrow

So deep that it didn't even bleed and catch me
Off guard, red handed
Now I'm far from lonely
Asleep I still see you lying next to me
So deep that it didn't even bleed and catch me I..

I need something else
Would someone please just give me
Hit me, knock me out
And let me go back to sleep
I can laugh
All I want inside I still am empty
So deep that it didn't even bleed and catch me I...

I'll be just fine
Pretending I'm not
I'm far from lonely
And it's all that I've got

I'll be just fine
Pretending I'm not
I'm far from lonely
And it's all that I've got

I guess, I remember every glance you shot me
Un-harmed, I'm losing weight and some body heat
I squoze so hard
I stopped your heart from beating
So deep that I didn't even scream fuck me, I..

I'll be just fine
Pretending I'm not
I'm far from lonely
And it's all that I've got

I'll be just fine
Pretending I'm not
I'm far from lonely
And it's all that I've got

And it's all that I've got
Yeah, it's all that I've got
It's all that I've got
It's all that I've got
It's all that I've got!

So deep that it didn't even bleed and catch me
So deep that I didn't even scream fuck me

I'll be just fine
Pretending I'm not
I'm far from lonely
And it's all that I've got

I'll be just fine
Pretending I'm not
I'm far from lonely
And it's all that I've got

And it's all that I've got
Yeah, it's all that I've got

A song tht keeps me prevailed from my impediments. Thanks to the used for this fuckin great song. I guess we're not perfect, so we do made mistakes ryt. So im sorry for every single thing. This 19 yrs had brought to me lots of experiences in going through the journey called life. I've made lots of friends and enemies as well i guess(i hope not). LOL. And thanks to all who are always thre for me especially, cath, juria, fuzzie, fir n the rest of the CLiCKs, kimberley, reesh, nishy, illya, alyaa, hanif, nadjwa & faris. It means a lot to me and i really2 appreciated it guys. Thanks. =D. Lastly, i hope everything will turn out well as i want it to be. Shiieettt, I hate this part right here.

mirul

hands held high

Daarrnnn, tht song is stucked in my head. With hands held high, into a sky so blue, as the ocean opens up, to swallow you. Ahahahha. Well life been great so far except for uia. Hectic as usual. Pffttt. Im on holiday atm, but friggin assignment are keeping me away from it. Shhiiittt. Its been 3 days, & I've been sitting home doin all these shitt, especially drawing. The best subj ever. I wish. Ahahhaha. So updates huh?? Nutin much act, just normal lame story tho. Wake up, eat, play, internet, sleep. LOL. Studies are good i guess. Hahahaha. Mid term comin up in few days. WTF so fastt. I dnt even realised what hv i been studying for the last couple weeks. Shiieeettt I need to do well. Study mirul study!!

Yaaa, radiohead & paramore r performin live on sunburst. Need to go. Huhuhuhu.

I'm damn bored now. Someone made me wait. =/.

after midnight

Errr. Where do i start? Hmmmmmm. Okayyy. First and for most, happy two zero zero nine. =D. New resolution. Do well in every single thing. Fyi I've started my first year degree. Gombak. Its been 2 or 3 weeks. Overall the place was ok. The food is awesome. Various of choices tho. Lots of international students. Mainly from middle-east. Some are really huge. LOL. Got Man, Acap & Fattah as roommates and classmates as well. Ahahahhaa. However, the distance to our classes are like so far. It took us like 20 minutes to walk which we didn't do that often. We alternately drive to campus. So orientation was pretty boring tho. Lalalalalaa. I took 9 subj this sem. Hope I can finish asap. Insy. Hmm what else?? Thinking thinking. Ahahaha.

Moving on, attended few lectures atm. Most of my lecturers are foreigners. Great. New experiences and some funny accent to be shared (somebody, as for today n etc). LOL. Besides that, every classes are packed, one class its like 60-70 students. Daymmn. (this sentence has been removed due to some circumstances) Ahahhahaha. LOL. Okayy So thats pretty much for a few weeks tho. Nothing really great happened besides Im gettin distracted in class. Pffftttttt.

Apart from that, I would like to share some interesting facts which i think some of you had read or heard it somewhere. Its bout the term LOVE. Love is like everywhere. Its related to everything tho. As you can see most of the themes for movies, songs, novels n so forth are nothing else but love. So there are few type of love which defines it. Ehem. LOL. Okayy. First fact : If you love someone because you think he or she is really gorgeous, then it is not love, its "Infatuation". Secondly : if you love some one because you think that you shouldn't leave him because others think that you shouldn't, then it's not love it's "Compromise". Then, if you love some one because you have been kissed by him or her, then it's not love it's "Inferiority complex". In addition, if you love some one because you cannot leave him or her thinking that it would hurt his or her feelings, then it's not love it's "Charity". Besides, if you love some one because you share every thing with him or her, then it's not love it's "Friendship". Apparently, If you feel the pain of the other person more than him or her even when he or she is stable and you cry for him or her, if you get attracted to other people but stay with him or her without any regrets and if you let him or her go knowing that he or she has to go but he or she doesn't want to that's "LOVE". From my point of view, everyone fall for the first category tho which is infatuation.Well, love is not like anything, especially a fucking knife. Jk. Even freaks need love.

Finders Keepers
Daaaaa~

run right back in

Its been a while, hasn't it? Ahahhahaa. Well apart from being busy and all, I guess I'm just lazy tho. Okayy no productive activities are done during the hols, to be honest I've been sleeping and going out a lot. LOL. I know it sounds unhealthy tho but who cares its holiday so just let it be. Not to mention I'm dead broke now. For real. Hehehe. Holiday? hmm I'm going no where tho. My family are, they're leaving to Bali next week. Pffttt. Din got admitted to the hospital few days back. He broke his wrist while playing futsal. He went through surgery and got his hand screwed and stitched. Poor guy. So yesterday, Fattah picked me up and visited him. And few days back had dinner with batch, liyana and khairil. The last time I've seen them was in school. Ahahaha. It was fun tho. We had dinner in bangsar and desert in pj. LOL.

Hmm. Well lots of stuff have been goin on in my life right now. For the time being I've been surrounded by so much craziness. Lots of thinking should be done. Haish. Besides that, I'm currently reading choke by Palahniuk. It was marvelous. Halfway through now. Thanks for the recommendation Naqi. Looking forward for the other books. Anyhoooo I'm gettin an ipod touch really really soon. Yeay. There's a rock band acoustic performances at lepaq in hartamas tonight. Cath invited for it. Supposed to go actually but then there's few things that should be taken care of. Sorry Cath next time k [do not torture me for this k. hee]. Btw, thanks for the invite. Okayy now I'm brain dead. Totally zero. Will write more often. =D

the adorable jigsaw

till then.

maybe memories

Its been a while uh. Huhu. Well I've been busy enjoying every moment of my hols. Its been a month and another to go(or less). Time were spent incredibly fun with friends and family. Basically, I'm kinda lazy atm. LOL.

Fyi, I have completed my foundation studies. Finals were okkaayy i guess. Results? I'll mention it later, if I do remember. So speaking of holidays or break or whatsoever, the first week had been amazing. It was still in the raya month, so me and my roommates went to each of our houses for raya, well not all of us. So we went to Fattah's house, then my house then Acap's. Few days later, we crashed at Oggy's house which is in PD for our farewell vacation since some of us will be leaving the uni. So yea, we spent a couple nights there. We did few great activities together. After a few days there, we headed back to KL and stopped by at Sol's and Ari's place. We had a great time. It was totally unforgettable and languorous. Awesome shhieettzerr.


Next was my birthday. 08 November 08. Weee. Thanks to all who had wished me. Really appreciated it guys. Firstly thanks to my family, especially my mom. Then special thanks to Naqi, Armand, Macha, Reesh, Sutesh, Shiresh and others for the birthday eve celebration. It was so generous of you all. And thanks for the presents as well guys. Next thanks to Faris and Nadjwa who had treated me for lunch at DELIcious. The food was absolutely satisfying. Thank you again kudik2 & milo. Wee. Lastly, thanks to my CLiCK who had celebrated my birthday with a delicate surprise. And thanks to Fuzzie and Juria for the birthday cake. It was exquisitely tasteful. You guys have been really great and had left a thumb print in my heart. Gracias. Love.


Just for the record, twilight the movie will be out soon which is tomorrow. Niicceeee. Ahahaha, nway got the soundtrack, to be honest it was pretty bad. LOL. But few songs are quite nice tho. Not to mention, the fans are killing it, totally. Haish. You were right Naqi.
Till today hols had been great. =D

letting go of tonight

update! update! update! everybody has been telling me to do so. Well fyi I've been really really busy since the last class finished till now with raya, exams and stuff. It stressed the hell out of me. Seriously. Since it is still in raya month, I've been receiving lots of invitation to free weight gain programme (open houses) from friends and family as well. And not to mention, I'm in the exam period which is very important for me to stay put and focus on it. LOL. Speaking of exams, I just finished my first paper of finals which is btq just now. It was ok tho, managed to answered it. =D. Yesterday night, went to Illya's open house with Dimi & Sutesh. Pick them up around 8 and headed the destination. Huhuhu the food there was superb, we took a load of it. Especially the cheese cake!! good job Illya. Izzera was there too. Then lepak in Illya's room. You sure got a lots of things in there eh Illya. Hee. Took couple of pics and headed back later cuz Im havin exam on the next mornin, oops i mean afternoon. Hahaha LOL.

Woke up early today, revised and went through all the notes for the last time before taking the exam. Then, prepared myself and got back to uia few hours early before the paper starts.After the paper ends, brought Rahman and Acap to digital mall to buy some cd & stuff. It was raining heavily, so we got wet on our way there since I parked the car quite far from the mall. Coincidently, met Dimi & Illya there. She was looking for maxis center cuz she just lost her phone during the open house thingy. Kesian die.=/ It wasnt there, so we went to pyramid to settle it. Had subway with them. Chatted bla3 and stuff then got ourselves back home. We had fun. My next paper starts on Wednesday straight till Sunday. Gulp. All the best mirul.

My dad is letting go the C180 tomorrow. Sob3.

Till then.

how to deal

Fear has a new name. I've read it somewhere. Here's a few of it which seems to look interesting to me.
Octophobia - the fear of figure eight.
Globophobia - the fear of balloons.
Ablutophobia - the fear of bathing.
Pentheraphobia - the fear of your mother-in-law. (WTF..)

I've been wondering, if there is a name for the fear of homeworks and assingments, or maybe the fear of due dates, cause I've been terrified by those for the past few weeks. It was really a pain in my arse. Next week will be a complete nightmare for me as lots of unsettled stuff and homeworks to be submitted cause its reaching towards the end of the semester and final is just around the corner. Restless is what I'm facing now. Things which are to be submitted and done next week:

Monday: Physics lab grading, programming project, math IV tutorial 5, physics III tutorial 7 and physics III quiz 4&5.
Tuesday: Chemistry II tutorial 10 and programming assignment 5.
Wednesday: Chemistry II quiz 10.
Thursday: Maths IV quiz 5, physics III quiz 6&7, compilations of maths IV tutorials and btq quiz 2.

Daaaaa.

never wanted to

I wasn't in my best condition for the past couple days, unwell. So most of the time i was in bed. Maybe it is due to the weather, rain and stuff. Yet the weather is perfect which i really do not have any problems with it. On Friday i slept the whole day (practically its not the whole day but you know, woke up for Friday prayer and stuff). For this fasting month, I'm off campus. So I drove to coll, the worst part is the traffic. Seriously. Since I had been stationary for hours in bed, I couldn't get my eyes closed at night. So I started to go online, watch tv and stuff. Oo ya, prison break season 4 is out, I've managed to download the first 2 episode. It was off the hook, seriously to those of you who followed the series, watch it. While surfing the net, Faris then sent an IM through the messenger. He called for late night supper since it is already 2 in the morning. So he picked me up and went to darus at 15. We had nasi lemak and hot teh tarik. It was a pleasant meal. Got back at 5, had sahur(early breakfast) with family and cleaned up for Subuh prayer. While waiting for Subuh, chatted with Illya. She was busy telling me to sign up for facebook cause its addictive and bla bla. LOL. Later, woke up at 9 and got prepared for class at 10. After class, got myself home and get some rest. Chatted with Sabrina that evening and coincidently she was also persuading me to join facebook. She was actually forcing me to do it. Then I ended up joining it. Haish. Its ok tho, as long as I could keep in touch with all my friend, thats good enough. But I just dont get it. Why facebook?? why?? why??

Till then.

come september

Last weekend was one of my best weekends. Most of the time spent were incredibly amazing. I had a photo shoot with the CLiCKs last friday. It went well as we planned. Not all the members were there but its ok tho, we understood. The venue was extremely pleasant, it was at boulevard's or summervilla's park in wangsa baiduri, either one. Not to mention, the weather was perfect. So yea we took lots of pics to be uploaded in our web. Thanks a bunch to Ihsan who took those ostentatious pictures. Besides pictures, we also recorded few clips from the act of certain people such as arin, fir, irwan, daryl, juria and others. It was hilarious. LOL. After a period of camera posing, we gathered somewhere along the park and just chilled. Since some of us brought our laptops, we then started to go online and transfer those pics and vids as well. It was fun tho. Some of the shots ye. Take a look at this clip : "broken part I".


The following day was fully occupied with rest. I was totally in need of it. So yea i woke up pretty late. Nad was participating in the Msia yoyo competition on that day. So he was hoping some of us could come and support him. Unfortunately, none of us came tho. Sorry dude I've tried to persuade them. Then at night, Naqi called for a dinner with Macha and Armand. Its been months or almost a year maybe, since I've seen them. Daymmmnn. So Naqi picked me up at 9. We then had dinner at strawberry fields somewhere in Taipan. The place was good, i would say acceptable and the foods as well. We were busy laughing and exchanging our stories and rumors till the worker told us that the restaurant was about to close up. Later, we headed to Mc Donalds for desserts and started talking again. We ended up going back home at 3. It was fun and tired at the same time but its definitely worth the time spent. Thanks to all who had made my weekend. You guys are all that I've got.

Armand, Sakthi a.k.a Macha & Naqie

This week was hell out of a week. Some of the mid term results were already out. And yea I've got some of mine. The grades was not satisfying but yeah let bygone be bygone. I've managed to get an A for my calculus II and B+ for C++(programming). Haish Im starting to lose my grip on my studies due to lots of distractions I supposed. So I should put more effort to score on my finals tho. Btw, I went to the ELC my stage(talent show) on one of the days in the previous week. Most of the performance was average to me cause most of them was singing. Some of it was really outstanding and did wow me out from my seat. Fattah's performance was absolutely awesome. The crowds were practically cheering for him. Then Nad's performance was totally creative in the greatest way. Next was Illya's, she sang "The Hell Song" by sum 41 and her own song. OMG her voice was splendid and marvelous. Im sure some of the crowds had felt for it. Yea i did. LOL.

Its the merdeka eve tonight and yet here am I in front of my laptop downloading stuff and surfing the net. What a celebration. LOL. I was never into the celebration thingy due to some reasons tho. But whatever as long as you're proud of it, its more than enough. Msia is turning 51 by 12. So happy merdeka to all. Have fun.

Till then. Adios.